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The Fulham statue and four other insane football excuses

| 07.05.2014

Once in a while a story comes along with a headline that makes you read twice. One such example is the latest offering from Fulham’s eccentric former owner Mohamed Al Fayed, who has blamed the removal of a statue for the Cottagers relegation.

Fulham have been labelled 11/4 shots to make an immediate return to the top flight next season but according to Al Fayed, they’d still be in the Premier League if it wasn’t for the removal of the Micheal Jackson statue he had erected outside Craven Cottage in 2011, which was removed in September.

“When the new owner decided to move it I said ‘Fine, it is a lucky thing, you will regret it later’,” Al Fayed said.

“Now the new owner will regret it because I warned him. I said ‘You will pay with blood for that’ because it was something loved by people.

“It was a big mistake but he paid for it now. He’s been relegated and if he wakes up he’ll ask for Michael Jackson again and I’ll say ‘No way’.”

Former French National boss Raymond Domenech, who famously said he couldn’t coach Robert Pires because he was a Scorpio, explains his selection policy back in 2008.

“All parameters have to be considered and I have added one by saying there is astrology involved”.

Johan Cruyff very strangely targeted the Dutch foreign minister for not naturalising Ivory Coast striker Salamon Kalou before the 2006 World Cup, where Holland made an early exit.

“I don’t want to say the minister is to blame for the Dutch team getting knocked out, but she is definitely partly to blame.”

“Holland were put in a situation that if [wingers] Arjen Robben and Robin van Persie were not playing well there was no alternative,” Cruyff said.

“Salomon Kalou would have given us one,” he said.

Sir Alex Ferguson famously blamed the colour of a grey away kit for going in 3-0 down to Southampton at half time back in 1996.

“The manager just stormed in and said: “Get that kit off, you’re getting changed,” remembers Lee Sharpe.

Lastly, Ukrainian defender Vladislav Vashchuk tried to deflect blame for his side’s 4-0 defeat to Spain at the 2006 World Cup on some issues back at the hotel.

Vashchuk said: “Because of the frogs’ croaking we hardly got a wink of sleep.”

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Christian Crowther

Give Christian a sport with anything remotely spherical in it and he’ll happily while away the hours watching it on the box. However, he’d much prefer writing about, playing or betting on golf, football, cricket, tennis, snooker.... you get the picture.